Art's Performing Center Reviews

2.8

144 East Juneau Avenue

Milwaukee, Wisconsin 53202

fuckery12

posted on 9 July, 2015
Joined 8 years ago
317 reviews posted
Overall Rating1.0
Quality of the Dancers
1
Private Dances, Value for Money
1.5
Overall Hospitality
1.5
Guest to Dancer Ratio
1.5
Variety of Dancers
2
Value for Money, Cover Charge
0.5
Value for Money, Drinks
2
Value for Money, Food
N/A
OVerall Atmosphere
0.5
Sound System and DJ
1

Stay away... Seriously, you're liable to catch something just by walking in.

rogerrab2

posted on 15 March, 2015
Joined 4 years ago
187 reviews posted
Overall Rating5.0
Quality of the Dancers
5
Private Dances, Value for Money
5
Overall Hospitality
5
Guest to Dancer Ratio
5
Variety of Dancers
5
Value for Money, Cover Charge
5
Value for Money, Drinks
5
Value for Money, Food
5
OVerall Atmosphere
5
Sound System and DJ
5

Giving Art's Performing Center anything less than five stars seems denigratory to pregnancy and prison ink; the homeless and the soon-to-be Marquette graduates. Not individually of course, but collectively, as they are often found in this gem of gentleman's entertainment. The clamor of homeless individuals lining the walk from the outdoor ATM (a requirement given the cash cover) to the front door has the feel of paparazzi beside a red-carpet -- albeit with far fewer cameras and much more colorful language. (If you were thinking of bringing your lady-friend here 1) you probably don't need to read anymore 2) that's a bold strategy and I wish y'all the best)Enter APC and make your way past a bouncer who grins as he takes your five-spot but belies happiness with his eyes -- eyes that too often have gazed inside the performing center when lines are short and colleges are on vacation -- and immediately you know you will not soon forget the experience. Anytime you visit APC you are guaranteed to see something you never have before. Earlier reviews mentioned a man pretending to gun down a bouncer and potential links to bio-terrorism, and I believe every word. Do not, however, dismiss Art's as non-thought provoking....Why do you think they picked such a clever name?? Midway through my last visit, my mind wandered from the c-scarred dancers to the music, where I heard the words "Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose" rendered over the speakers. The lyric seemed to make the pregnant bartender very very sad, but at the same time proved cathartic for our dancer Trixxxxie (four "x's" because, as she informed us, she is double the trouble). In this man's opinion, anywhere prison ink mixes with philosophy AND no hard time involved is a win-win. The women here are like cats -- you're probably allergic, and if you stare them down they'll think you're about to attack -- but this is Milwaukee, so that's not exclusive to Art's. Yes, they're more likely to run you off the road while you're on a bridge than make you rice pudding, but don't let that discourage you....support this local business and the folks that run it. And while the old expression about the quickest way into a strippers panties is to pick them up off of the floor holds true.....maybe hold off on that until this bio-terrorism allegation is settled.

fritter17

posted on 11 August, 2013
Joined 6 years ago
275 reviews posted
Overall Rating5.0
Quality of the Dancers
5
Private Dances, Value for Money
5
Overall Hospitality
5
Guest to Dancer Ratio
5
Variety of Dancers
5
Value for Money, Cover Charge
5
Value for Money, Drinks
5
Value for Money, Food
5
OVerall Atmosphere
5
Sound System and DJ
5

This is quite possibly the best-named gentleman's club, ever.The girls are really nasty looking. They have fat where there shouldn't be fat and jiggle in unexpected places. There wasn't one even remotely attractive girl there. The bartenders are also very gross.The bar is awful, but beers and shots were cheap.The patrons of this bar are trash, and very creepy, even for a strip club. Most of them didn't have money for a lap dance, so when my friend bought one, they all hovered over him to watch, sick.Sit next to the stage. For only a dollar or two, the girls here will get right on top of you. My friends were very impressed with this aspect of Art's.I only go to these places for bachelor parties. This one tops them all as the dirtiest and ugliest girls.

BoxLunch

posted on 31 July, 2013
This review was posted anonymously

Overall Rating3.2
Quality of the Dancers
3.8
Private Dances, Value for Money
3.8
Overall Hospitality
3.8
Guest to Dancer Ratio
3.8
Variety of Dancers
1.2
Value for Money, Cover Charge
3.8
Value for Money, Drinks
3.8
Value for Money, Food
N/A
OVerall Atmosphere
2.5
Sound System and DJ
3.8

Ho Hum.

richard95

posted on 29 July, 2012
Joined 8 years ago
320 reviews posted
Overall Rating2.0
Quality of the Dancers
N/A
Private Dances, Value for Money
1.5
Overall Hospitality
1.5
Guest to Dancer Ratio
1
Variety of Dancers
3.5
Value for Money, Cover Charge
3
Value for Money, Drinks
2
Value for Money, Food
3
OVerall Atmosphere
1.5
Sound System and DJ
3.5

If you're in Milwaukee and looking for a fun time out for the guys, just go to Art's. Is it classy? No. Is it respectable? No. Is it clean? Of course not! It's a strip club, but it certainly isnt a petri dish breeding ground for bioterrorism like a previous review said (though admittedly that was part of the reason we decided to go).First, it's a $5 cover and the entertainment factor is well worth it (that's the only thing that drove my review). As we entered we saw the bouncer get into it with a lanky crack head who after it all ended, made a gun with his fingers and went "pop pop," which made it even more exciting to go in. side note, the area is swarming with cops and they promptly tossed him into a wall, cuffed him and arrested him.It's a small, quaint establishment with only one stage and a small not so private area for dances, though I opted out of that one. The dancers are bad. Skinny, but not attractive. Tattoos covered one dancer almost over 75% of her body, and not quality ink... Good old fashioned prison tats. One had a lovely tattoo of a moon smoking a joint. Now that's class! C-scars? You betcha! They're aplenty and might possibly be a prerequisite for employment here, but as a parent, I think it's important to support single mothers.Other reviews mentioned the girls trolling for tips after their shows and I didn't see any of that though if it does happen, remember it is ok to say no.But what made me really love this place, what made it worth the short walk from our hotel and certainly the cover charge was the pregnant bartender behind the bar. You heard me right boys and girls, a pregnant bartender.For all these reasons, the short time we spent here made our night a success and I felt compelled to suggest to anybody they come here for a laugh!

AssnTits5

posted on 14 May, 2012
Joined 9 years ago
352 reviews posted
Overall Rating2.0
Quality of the Dancers
3
Private Dances, Value for Money
1
Overall Hospitality
1
Guest to Dancer Ratio
2
Variety of Dancers
1
Value for Money, Cover Charge
1.5
Value for Money, Drinks
2
Value for Money, Food
1
OVerall Atmosphere
3.5
Sound System and DJ
1.5

So, I'm not the type that frequents places like this. I missed my buddy's bachelor party a couple weeks ago, and as we were walking by this place after the Arena Football game, he wanted to go in. Being a good friend, how could I say no?Strip clubs are dark and dirty and filled with mostly terrible people. This place wasn't an exception. Now, to the point I'm sure everyone is dying to know:Yes, the bar has three (count em, THREE) types of beef jerky. They also have Fritos.Long story short, we paid our $5 cover, had our two drinks, and left.

Franklyn

posted on 26 February, 2012
Joined 7 years ago
283 reviews posted
Overall Rating1.0
Quality of the Dancers
0.5
Private Dances, Value for Money
1
Overall Hospitality
1
Guest to Dancer Ratio
0.5
Variety of Dancers
0.5
Value for Money, Cover Charge
2
Value for Money, Drinks
2.5
Value for Money, Food
1
OVerall Atmosphere
N/A
Sound System and DJ
1

OMG. Gross.The floor is the petri dish. The contents are the active culture. Yes. Bioterrorism smells like that.

shaq9999

posted on 16 May, 2011
This review was posted anonymously

Overall Rating1.6
Quality of the Dancers
1.2
Private Dances, Value for Money
1.2
Overall Hospitality
1.2
Guest to Dancer Ratio
1.2
Variety of Dancers
2.5
Value for Money, Cover Charge
2.5
Value for Money, Drinks
2.5
Value for Money, Food
1.2
OVerall Atmosphere
1.2
Sound System and DJ
1.2

had a couple of hott black girls but club is a dump most of girls are waste of money

joseph1k

posted on 6 August, 2010
Joined 9 years ago
338 reviews posted
Overall Rating1.0
Quality of the Dancers
N/A
Private Dances, Value for Money
0.5
Overall Hospitality
0.5
Guest to Dancer Ratio
0.5
Variety of Dancers
0.5
Value for Money, Cover Charge
1.5
Value for Money, Drinks
N/A
Value for Money, Food
2.5
OVerall Atmosphere
1
Sound System and DJ
2.5

At least you won't ruin your boxers at this club! Of course, if you've got a fetish for 6's telling you about their boyfriend and smoking Newports,

Jacob J.

posted on 16 November, 2009
This review was posted anonymously

Overall Rating1.0
Quality of the Dancers
1.5
Private Dances, Value for Money
0.5
Overall Hospitality
0.5
Guest to Dancer Ratio
0.5
Variety of Dancers
0.5
Value for Money, Cover Charge
1.5
Value for Money, Drinks
1.5
Value for Money, Food
2
OVerall Atmosphere
1
Sound System and DJ
0.5

Downtown area Gentleman's club, not really gentlemanly, more of a hole in the wall with dancers. Cover was $5 (I think) and posted at the door it says there is a 2 drink minimum. I got a draft of Lienenkugel which was pricey and only gave me an 8 oz mug of it. WTF? Not 12oz? Bottles is the better option for your money. We walked in and had ourselves a drink each, within the first five minutes we knew we wanted to get the fuck out of there. We had options and this wasn't the best for us. There were less than five customers there and most tipped only their favorite. I think we saw four girls out of seven they had working this night and two had c-section scars with muffin tops. Women were of different nationalities including South American, African-American, two white chicks and didn't see the others. There was a drunken waitress who was useless to us, mumbling and eating in a corner. Small place; walking to the bar for a drink is not a hassle. Lighting is composed of neon and black light, so things like scars, puppy fat and spillage aren't apparent unless you are up close. No clue if dances are offered, like I said the place is small and it didn't look like there are any private areas for personal dances. In Wisconsin performers do this obnoxious routine of hitting up everyone seated anywhere requiring a tip for their performance. I'm told that it's up to you whether or not to tip, but place after place the women come down on you with a plethora of commenting to tip them. I loathe tipping people for no reason, WTF for? Especially if I don't want to, leave me alone! At the bar 95% of the area is smoking and to one side in a crappy corner of the room it's labeled non-smoking. Street parking only.

ryan123

posted on 15 August, 2009
Joined 9 years ago
345 reviews posted
Overall Rating2.0
Quality of the Dancers
0.5
Private Dances, Value for Money
3
Overall Hospitality
3
Guest to Dancer Ratio
2
Variety of Dancers
2
Value for Money, Cover Charge
3
Value for Money, Drinks
1.5
Value for Money, Food
1
OVerall Atmosphere
1.5
Sound System and DJ
1.5

I give this two stars: 1 for raunch factor, the other for a few (and only a few) very attractive African-American dancers. For lap dances, Milwaukee County sucks. No contact, minimal at best and this place is no exception. Squalid 80's glam would be the best definition of the interior. Unless a less expensive door fee is a selling point for you, stick to Club OTB.

HOT GUY

posted on 21 October, 2008
This review was posted anonymously

Overall Rating4.5
Quality of the Dancers
5
Private Dances, Value for Money
3.8
Overall Hospitality
3.8
Guest to Dancer Ratio
3.8
Variety of Dancers
5
Value for Money, Cover Charge
5
Value for Money, Drinks
3.8
Value for Money, Food
5
OVerall Atmosphere
5
Sound System and DJ
5

THIS WAS A GREAT CLUB

Ken Kniff

posted on 4 January, 2008
This review was posted anonymously

Overall Rating2.6
Quality of the Dancers
2.5
Private Dances, Value for Money
2.5
Overall Hospitality
2.5
Guest to Dancer Ratio
3.8
Variety of Dancers
2.5
Value for Money, Cover Charge
3.8
Value for Money, Drinks
2.5
Value for Money, Food
N/A
OVerall Atmosphere
1.2
Sound System and DJ
2.5

Can an itty bitty brother get some luv?

hey jealousy

posted on 7 December, 2007
This review was posted anonymously

Overall Rating5.0
Quality of the Dancers
5
Private Dances, Value for Money
5
Overall Hospitality
5
Guest to Dancer Ratio
5
Variety of Dancers
5
Value for Money, Cover Charge
5
Value for Money, Drinks
5
Value for Money, Food
5
OVerall Atmosphere
5
Sound System and DJ
N/A

when you get your club you can run it your way

what a joke

posted on 3 December, 2007
This review was posted anonymously

Overall Rating1.2
Quality of the Dancers
1.2
Private Dances, Value for Money
1.2
Overall Hospitality
1.2
Guest to Dancer Ratio
1.2
Variety of Dancers
1.2
Value for Money, Cover Charge
1.2
Value for Money, Drinks
1.2
Value for Money, Food
1.2
OVerall Atmosphere
1.2
Sound System and DJ
1.2

charlotte is an ugly, go-nowhere hag. she's done absolutely NOTHING with that place. what a waste.

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